Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Day 7 - Going in for Outpatient Care Assessment

So, this morning at 10 AM, my husband and I walk back into the hospital where I was kept for 4 days, in a sense against my will, in a sence completely willingly.  We are to meet with a social worker to see if I a am good candidate for this program.  They officially call it, "Back to work" or "Back to functioning living" program.  Hmmmm...

So, long story short, after about an hour of a seemingly endless amount of questions, I was admitted!  I am scheduled to start on Thursday.  For the next 6-8 weeks of my life, my days will look like this:

9:45-10:30 AM - Symptom Management (now, I have no idea what many of these things are, but I know I'm attending them...)

10:30-10:45 - Break

10:45-11:30 - Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy

11:30-11:45 - Break

11:45- 12:30 PM - Group Psychotherapy

12:30-1:45 - Lunch

1:15-2:00 - Practical Coping

and HOME!

That is the next 6-8 weeks of my life.  Let's hope it works, because even today I had yet another intrusive thought of SIDS and fought with my precious husband, (well, not fought, but not agreed) about it.  He said, Gabriel will be fine and I said, "How do you KNOW that? You DON'T KNOW!"  That went on until he suggested I take another Kolopin and take a nap... which I did.

The torture in my mind is unbearable.  I'm up, then I'm down.  It's maddening, literally.  I really need this program to help me, or I see my life slipping through my fingers.


  1. PPD etc. can bring on a form of bipolar with very short & abrupt sequences. You should plan on getting used to it, and know that at some point it will stop and you get back to an even keel. You can handle it. Just keep talking to yourself that you can out wait it. "I am strong. This will go away." Make sure to take your vitamins and build your body & mind up after the stresses of pregnancy and post-pregnancy even after taking your meds.

  2. I have lived with bipolar all my life. If I can do it, so can you muscle through this with lots of prayer & Bible study. They help plus regular sleep, exercise in moderation, and vitamins. No extremes or excesses. How's the baby?

  3. The baby is perfect, precious and adorable. :)